Today's my first day of sem break and I'm actually not excited at all... I think my finals has really drained every part of my soul away, plus the death of Cory Monteith.
My finals was quite fucked up. Remember how I said I hated this semester's subjects? Well I really tried to pour my heart and soul into studying, but I can't. I really can't go back to the time where I'll give it my all to study a subject I hate anymore. It's a really bad thing but hey, I'm one step closer to finally start studying subjects that I'm interested in!
I would still have 7 subjects next semester *groans* but I'll make sure I'll pick the right subjects (NO MORE CHEMISTRY) and also I can't take freedom for granted anymore. I seriously promise I'll put in twice the effort as I did in my last sem (which is technically only 25%) hehe.
here's me bidding chem goodbye hoyeah!
Okay let's talk about Cory. I don't even know how should I start this. I think I'm being extra emotional on his death because he left Lea Michele behind (which is my favourite singer OF ALL TIME). Can you imagine how much pain Lea is going through...... *cries a river*
Glee has influenced me in one major thing - Broadway musicals. My love towards broadway and musicals and old songs I've never thought I'll hear just grew. I would actually read about the songs they cover and that's how I learnt that there are greater music out there that has not been discovered. Glee is the reason why I wanted to pursue Performing Arts (it still remains as my dream until today) and why I dread to watch a Broadway show in New York. Glee gave me a dream.
Lea Michele's voice is heaven sent. She's the only female vocal artist that I'll never get bored of. Her ambitious personality inspired me so much, so much that I went against all odds to pursue my interests in life, without giving a single fuck to all those who doubts me. So many has said that my career choice is pointless, it's stupid and I'm basically digging my own grave. But a part of me believes that if I try harder, I'll make it. Glee made me think that way.
The fact that the lead actor is gone just ripped my soul apart. What's worst is that he left his love aka my fav singer aka the one who inspired me BEHIND. I can't even begin to express how depressed I feel. Lea Michele was my idol, and their relationship was a proof to me that as long as you have a core support, you would own the world. But her support died. Bye. Poof.
Before this, I was never brave enough to admit that Glee inspired me. I was quite ashamed to tell everyone that I was a loyal fan of Glee from the start. Glee gave me hope. Glee gave me a path in life. The casts made gave me a dream, and Lea inspired me to go for it. Thinking about the amount of pain she has to go through now just kills me. Cory. Drugs. Why.
I give credits to Cory for checking himself into rehab volunteerly when he noticed he's starting to have a problem again. He was getting better. He was getting happier. I don't know what happened....
My heart and soul goes out to the entire Glee family, and Lea. Oh Lea...
xx.
